Why Bear Grylls Deserves to be My Hollywood Boyfriend

Some of you scoffed at me when I revealed my Hollywood crush last weekend. To be honest, I was a little offended. Bear Grylls is as deserving, or even more so, of my devotion as Ellen Degeneres is of Brandon's. Of course, I'm a happily married woman, so I'm not in the market for a love interest, but I think Bear and I could be very good friends. Let's put our compatibility to the test:
#1 - We both like sushi.

#2 - We both appreciate a nice fur coat.

#3 - We like salty stuff.

For more Bear clips, check him out on YouTube (don't listen to all the jealous wannabes who call him a fake) or watch Man vs. Wild on the Discoery channel.

Possible Themes For This Year's Thanksgiving Extravaganza

1. To-ga! To-ga! To-ga!

2. Saved by the Bell: Hawaiian Vacation -  Scrunchees.  Double layered socks.  Muscle shirts. 

Leis.  Viewing of 1990 VHS recording of "Saved by the Bell: Hawaiian Vacation." Added perk: Mr. Belding in shorts.

3. Goth Prom - Unisex black lip liner.  Black carnation corsages. 

4. Cabaret - Liza! Liza! Liza!

5. IOWA - Black and gold.  Corn and lots of it.  Democrats.  Bad haircuts.

6. Harry Potter - Drawn-on scars.  Scarves.  British accents.  Old gay guys.

7. Clue - Colonel Ringger in the basement with a cornucopia.  Or was it Mrs. Jackson in the 

newly painted dining room with a turkey baster?  

8. Alias - Red wigs.  Cowboy hats.  Rambaldi inventions.  Code names.  (Dibs on "Snuffleupagus.")

9. Renaissance Festival - Pan Pipes.  Jesters.  Turkey legs. Unisex pantyhose. "Doth m'lady care for another helping of green bean casserole?"

10. Old School Style - Good food.  Good conversation.  Boys huddled, gossiping in the corner with the school directory.